You Had Me at "Get Lost"

This appeared under "missed connections" on craigslist

I pissed on your lawn - m4w - 58 (Old Town)

Date: 2009-09-22, 6:11PM EDT
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I was on my way home from the Green Parrot on Saturday night. I was stinking drunk and stopped to take a piss on your lawn. You were sitting on your porch and cussed me out. Even though you were very angry I felt we had a connection. I tried to apologize but you wouldn't listen. If we had met under different circumstances I think you would see that you are the one for me. I was too drunk that night to remember where you live, but I do remember the way your face shined in the moonlight when I exposed myself to you. I think I love you. So I can be sure that it is really you, put in the subject line the object you threw at my head.